Friday, June 28, 2013

Feeling a certain type of way this evening...

It has to do with feeling stuck in place here.  Feeling all alone here.

Took my kids and their cousin to the movies.  Took them out to eat afterward.  Ugh!! Just kidding.  I enjoyed the movie.  I saw World War Z with Nigel and Noah and Macy saw Monsters, Inc.  That World War Z movie was intense!

Now, at 8:49 PM on a Friday night, I am sitting at home and feeling rather lonely again.  Now that the school year is over, and the class reunion is done, I need to find something else to do with myself.  Hmmmm.... join a club?  Maybe some sort of singles' club for people over 40...  That sounds like something to look into.

At least I was offered a summer school position, and I will have something to do during the day.  Gotta work on this evening thing.  Mr. P is nice and all, but it would be silly to hang my wish upon his star.  Word. The fact that I'm sitting here and feeling lonely says a lot.

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Um hummm... :D

That's it.  Nothing else to say, except that it didn't end with a bang; more like a fizzle.

Monday, June 10, 2013

Added to the wish list...

I have discovered one more thing to add to my wish list:
He must be able to live within the quiet spaces of my life.

One of the things I prayed about when I was pregnant with my first child was that my child be able to understand I DO love him even when I'm quiet. I also prayed that He, in His infinite wisdom, would show me the times when words were necessary and to give me those words.

I'm going to hand this one over to Him as well.

I'm not so sure that my current friend is comfortable in my silence.

Yesterday, we went for a walk through the park.  It was okay. There were moments of silence. He would usually fill the void. The time before this one, he accused me of not talking much. Mostly, this is true.

Sometimes, if I have something worth saying, I'll say it.

I will work on communicating my thoughts more often.  I admit that I don't like it when the person I'm with appears closed off.  Maybe I can let my body talk for me when I don't fill like "chattering". Perhaps, I can put my arm through his, or I can wrap my arms around him. Something that says, "Hey. I'm here with you, and I'm enjoying your company."

Wow, what an epiphany!